Two things have occurred lately that have brought the matter of the elderly sub to mind. First, was a bit of personal mental reminiscing about my "subs of the past". For those of you who haven't followed my blog from its beginnings, I'll mention that before Karl and I met, I had three different subs in three different cities where I travelled in my job. One of these subs was over 60 years old, totally dedicated to me, and both a delightful person and an excellent sub. When I gave up my three subs to spend my time - and eventually - my life with Karl, this man was absolutely devastated. He told me how hard it was to find a true Dom who was interested in a man his age, and how he had heretofore been forced to seek the services of a professional Dominatrix. In short, he now feared that his chances of finding someone like me again were slim, to say the least.
I certainly sympathized with him and agreed that it would be very hard, but there was nothing I could really do to help him. I said my farewell, wished him well, and went on my way, but I've often thought about him and wondered if he'd managed to find another "me" out there. He'd now be around 70 years old, and unless he came across a Dom near his age, the chances of his finding a younger Dom willing to take on such an older sub.....well, not good at all.
The second thing turning my mind toward the eldersub is a current experience I've had at the home for the elderly where I serve as a volunteer. I enjoy reading to older people with eye problems, or playing games and/or conversing with people who have been relatively forgotten by their family and rarely have visitors, especially visitors who give a damn about them. A very sad situation to witness, and if I can bring a bit of human interaction to such people, it just makes me (and them) feel good. So many of the elderly have fascinating life experiences and there's so much to be learned from them if one simply takes the time to listen.
The home where I volunteer is for elderly people with physical disabilities as opposed to mental disabilities. People who simply can't care for themselves any more, but are mentally just fine. Many more women than men, and that's because women generally live longer than men, but still quite a few men among them. One man in particular is the person who has brought the problem of the eldersub to the forefront lately. He's 73 years old, and let's call him Pete. Very bright, very full of great stories from his past life as a college professor, but suffering from an arthritic condition that keeps him mostly wheelchair bound, though he can use a walker on good days. Unfortunately, his wife has passed away, his kids live thousands of miles away, and he sees them maybe once a year or so.
At any rate, Pete and I connected on a mental level, and after many conversations he revealed two things to me. One, he was a naturally submissive male who had had many submissive "scenes" with his wife, and two - and this was disconcerting to say the least - he sensed that I was a dominant woman! When I asked (and I admit to being a bit flustered) what brought him to this conclusion, he just gave me a sly smile and said "it takes a sub to know a Dom when he sees one", and that's all I could get out of him. Well, I just laughed and quickly changed the subject, but Pete waited a bit and said "Don't worry, your secret is safe with me, but I'd really like to explore the subject with you if you wouldn't mind".
I was quite taken aback at all of this, as I've never had anyone catch me out, so to speak, when I was in my "normal" mode, and I could not figure out how he had seen the real me under my vanilla façade. We'd had so many different conversations in the months that I'd known him, and I couldn't pinpoint anything that would have "outed" me as a dominant woman. While I was still reeling from what he said, Pete went on to say that he missed terribly the days when he could serve his wife as her sub and sometime slave, and that though he was crippled he still had sexual feelings and would be ever so grateful if I would at least talk to him about this subject so that he could once again feel some of "the thrill" of his past.
Whew! This was definitely a new situation for me. Luckily, a physical therapist arrived to work with Pete and I beat a hasty retreat before any more was said. It has been a week since that conversation, and I've had some time to think about it and discuss it with Karl. Not surprisingly, Karl was very sympathetic toward Pete, and he didn't see any reason why I shouldn't talk more to him about D/s matters. I said that I feared that it would lead to too many problems, especially if Pete wound up getting aroused as we talked. What then, and what if he actually wanted me to play an active role in his fantasies, whatever they might be? Plus, I said, do I really want to even admit that he was correct in his supposition concerning my dominance? Won't that just open up a can of worms that we take such pains to avoid in our vanilla lives?
As of now, I still haven't decided what to do. The whole thing has me thinking about the problems of the eldersub who still wants to feel the joy of submitting to a dominant woman. What a shame that when a male reaches a certain age, especially if he has physical infirmities, his days as a sub are likely to be done. It doesn't seem fair, and as for the matter of Pete, my gut feeling is just to tell him he was wrong in thinking I was a Dom, and perhaps avoid him in the future and let all of this disappear before it gets out of hand. However, I like him as a person and would miss interacting with him, and I'm certain that he feels the same way about me. So where do I go from here?
I'd be very interested in hearing what my readers have to say about this matter and about the problems of an eldersub in general.
Friday, September 30, 2016
Thursday, September 1, 2016
TROPICAL VACATION, THE FINALE
I used the rope to tie Karl in what I like to call a "mummy wrap". Rope around his entire body, from ankles to shoulders, knotted at various intervals to keep things firm and tidy, and very little wiggle room. Placed on his back on the floor beside the bed, he was a comforting sight as I prepared to nap.
"Karl, I want to be awakened in an hour and a half. Do your best to catch some sleep yourself, and call to me when the time is up. You'll be judged on your ability to meet the 90 minute wake up call, and for each minute over the correct time you'll earn two punishment points. For each minute under the correct time, you'll also be punished, but those minutes will give you double punishment points. I need my full 90 minutes. Understood?"
"Yes, Milady."
And so I napped. This sort of thing would happen all week, with variations on the way I tied up Karl, except for a few days when we went on trips around the island and into various parks and sites along the way. For these trips we hired a cab for four or five hours and did the tourist routine. No time for a nap, but it was fun to see the tropical splendor of the island. Most nights duplicated our first night with dinner out, some clubbing, etc., but we did go on two twilight sailboat cruises which were fun, and we saw some wonderful sunsets along the way.
About those punishment points, Karl was very familiar with the concept and knew full well what was coming. A little different in this case, however, in that all I really had as a "corporal" tool were belts, his and mine. His belts were a heavier leather than mine, so I used his, both folded over and straight out, during the week. One stroke per punishment point delivered to his ass. He earned 40 the first time, as in an effort to avoid double points for being early, he allowed the 90 minutes to go over by 20. He got better as the week progressed, but was never too early:) Such a clever boy!
My favorite day, in terms of bondage and punishment, was Thursday, when I decided to hogtie Karl for nap time. There are many variations on the hogtie, but I like the classical position, with the victim on his stomach, hands tied behind his back, ankles tied firmly, and a length of rope connecting the hands and ankles in such a way that the feet are up in the air and the body is bowed backwards. The amount of bow depends on the length of the rope between the ankles and hands, and some people like to involve the head, balls, etc. into the picture. On the day in question, however, it was the classic position plus a length of rope tying the elbows together as well. This prevents at least one form of escape, and since Karl was no Houdini, it was more than sufficient for keeping him stretched backwards and in place.
That Thursday found me fully awake and not needing a nap, so I decided to just play a bit with Karl, and after he'd been hogtied, I placed an apple in front of his face and said "Karl, your task is to eat this apple. When you're finished, I'll untie you, so get started." He attempted his first bite, but only managed to push the apple forward. Slithering ahead tortuously, he reached the apple again, and the same thing happened. Very amusing, and I watched as he kept trying and kept failing to get his teeth into that apple, each time forced to slither forward with great difficulty.
Gentlemen, you really should try this at home, assuming you have a partner willing to hogtie you, of course. It's virtually impossible to get that first bite going, as you'll find out. Well, I helped Karl out after about 10 minutes by placing my bare foot on the apple and holding it in place. He was finally able to get that first bite in, but when he went for the next bite, I moved my foot back a few inches, and once again the apple rolled away from him. More slithering, I replaced my foot, another bite, remove the foot, apple pushed ahead, and on and on we went. It was devilishly delightful to torment Karl in this way, I must admit, but eventually the apple lost its round shape, all the skin was gone, and my foot was getting icky with apple juice. I had Karl lick my foot clean, then had him chew away at the rest of the apple until nothing was left but the core. It all took about an hour, and then I felt like a quick nap. Karl was exhausted as well, so I left him in place and went off for a quick snooze.
"One hour, Karl, wake me in an hour. The same deal on punishment points." He later told me that he counted to 3600 in his head in order to get it close, the added another 60 to be sure that he wasn't early. He's such a quick learner! As a result, he only earned ten points that day. All in all, a fine afternoon, and before we knew it, it was Friday, the day before departure. Karl had been wonderful all week, and I decided to reward him that last day. After many hours of sexual teasing, I allowed him to use his cock, and we had a grand day of lovemaking with many orgasms reverberating throughout our room. It was truly a delightful grand finale, and that, my friends, was our Tropical Vacation.
"Karl, I want to be awakened in an hour and a half. Do your best to catch some sleep yourself, and call to me when the time is up. You'll be judged on your ability to meet the 90 minute wake up call, and for each minute over the correct time you'll earn two punishment points. For each minute under the correct time, you'll also be punished, but those minutes will give you double punishment points. I need my full 90 minutes. Understood?"
"Yes, Milady."
And so I napped. This sort of thing would happen all week, with variations on the way I tied up Karl, except for a few days when we went on trips around the island and into various parks and sites along the way. For these trips we hired a cab for four or five hours and did the tourist routine. No time for a nap, but it was fun to see the tropical splendor of the island. Most nights duplicated our first night with dinner out, some clubbing, etc., but we did go on two twilight sailboat cruises which were fun, and we saw some wonderful sunsets along the way.
About those punishment points, Karl was very familiar with the concept and knew full well what was coming. A little different in this case, however, in that all I really had as a "corporal" tool were belts, his and mine. His belts were a heavier leather than mine, so I used his, both folded over and straight out, during the week. One stroke per punishment point delivered to his ass. He earned 40 the first time, as in an effort to avoid double points for being early, he allowed the 90 minutes to go over by 20. He got better as the week progressed, but was never too early:) Such a clever boy!
My favorite day, in terms of bondage and punishment, was Thursday, when I decided to hogtie Karl for nap time. There are many variations on the hogtie, but I like the classical position, with the victim on his stomach, hands tied behind his back, ankles tied firmly, and a length of rope connecting the hands and ankles in such a way that the feet are up in the air and the body is bowed backwards. The amount of bow depends on the length of the rope between the ankles and hands, and some people like to involve the head, balls, etc. into the picture. On the day in question, however, it was the classic position plus a length of rope tying the elbows together as well. This prevents at least one form of escape, and since Karl was no Houdini, it was more than sufficient for keeping him stretched backwards and in place.
That Thursday found me fully awake and not needing a nap, so I decided to just play a bit with Karl, and after he'd been hogtied, I placed an apple in front of his face and said "Karl, your task is to eat this apple. When you're finished, I'll untie you, so get started." He attempted his first bite, but only managed to push the apple forward. Slithering ahead tortuously, he reached the apple again, and the same thing happened. Very amusing, and I watched as he kept trying and kept failing to get his teeth into that apple, each time forced to slither forward with great difficulty.
Gentlemen, you really should try this at home, assuming you have a partner willing to hogtie you, of course. It's virtually impossible to get that first bite going, as you'll find out. Well, I helped Karl out after about 10 minutes by placing my bare foot on the apple and holding it in place. He was finally able to get that first bite in, but when he went for the next bite, I moved my foot back a few inches, and once again the apple rolled away from him. More slithering, I replaced my foot, another bite, remove the foot, apple pushed ahead, and on and on we went. It was devilishly delightful to torment Karl in this way, I must admit, but eventually the apple lost its round shape, all the skin was gone, and my foot was getting icky with apple juice. I had Karl lick my foot clean, then had him chew away at the rest of the apple until nothing was left but the core. It all took about an hour, and then I felt like a quick nap. Karl was exhausted as well, so I left him in place and went off for a quick snooze.
"One hour, Karl, wake me in an hour. The same deal on punishment points." He later told me that he counted to 3600 in his head in order to get it close, the added another 60 to be sure that he wasn't early. He's such a quick learner! As a result, he only earned ten points that day. All in all, a fine afternoon, and before we knew it, it was Friday, the day before departure. Karl had been wonderful all week, and I decided to reward him that last day. After many hours of sexual teasing, I allowed him to use his cock, and we had a grand day of lovemaking with many orgasms reverberating throughout our room. It was truly a delightful grand finale, and that, my friends, was our Tropical Vacation.
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