THE ITCH: KARL'S RESPONSE: PART TWO

After I'd come to some conclusions regarding the points Karl had raised, I returned to his paper(s) and quickly found that Karl had managed to put aside the questions of sexual fidelity he had raised (at least for the time being) and moved on to some real introspection. "I decided to stop thinking just about the sexual things and began to look at the bigger picture," he wrote. "I am a sub, your sub. You are my Dom, I truly worship you, and I know that my number one priority is your happiness. I love that we've created a life together where we can both feel fulfilled, and I must never forget that your needs come first and always will. That thought has never left me and it's absolutely basic to who we are. You know this too, and yet you've always allowed me to express myself at some point, even if it's after a harsh lesson or punishment, and you've always given real thought to whatever I had to say. 

He went on: "You've allowed me to serve you alone and with your Femdom friends.   You've set up scenarios to satisfy my "slave" fantasies.  You've even loaned me out to Vanessa and trusted me to limit my sexual contact with her despite knowing full well that she might prove untrustworthy in that regard. In other words, you've had faith in me, allowed me physical contact with other Doms, and never harangued me with thoughts of jealousy.

"Who am I to deny you the very same thing? What sort of a sub would I be if I didn't trust you? What sort of relationship would we have then? I don't think either one of us would like it. You say that this itch is not about sex. You say that you still love me. You say that you have no intention of messing up our relationship. I must believe you. I must trust you as you've trusted me."

I was awestruck at his words, but Karl was not done yet.  He was about to drop a bomb.  "As I've thought more about those early training days, I started to feel a nostalgic connection to what that was like.  It turned me on to think about it and I began to wonder if I could experience that again, just as you want to do.  What would it be like to be trained anew by another dominant woman as if I were a novice once more?  I'm sure every training experience must be different with different dominant women, and even though I've been fully trained as your sub, there might be new things to be  learned from a different perspective.  Maybe if both of us were doing a "back in time" thing we could reach some new heights in our current relationship.  

"You'd have to find the right woman for me, of course.  Or am I being crazy here?  Am I making this about myself and not you?  Whatever....I'll leave it up to you.  I trust you completely.  If you want to go ahead and train a new sub, I won't object.  If you don't want me to serve a new Dom as her novice, that's fine.  I'm probably being nuts anyway when I even suggest it.  The important thing is that you are happy and know that I will not try to stand in your way as you scratch your itch.  I love you totally, and will serve you forever."

And that's where the composition ended.  The last part was a total surprise to me.  Karl had given his blessing to my desires despite his misgivings.  He had expressed total belief in me.  He would not try to stand in my way.  And...AND.....there was this thing about him wanting the same sort of thing, albeit from the other side, so to speak.  Since the thought had clearly occurred to him as a response to my itch, was it just a knee jerk sort of thing that would have him play a part in my itch scratching, even if it were clearly marginal?   Do I just ignore that part of his writing?   I certainly CAN ignore it in my position as Karl's Dom.

When we finally discussed what he wrote, I told him I would take his idea of being re-trained himself under advisement, but that finding a Dom I trusted with such a task would be very difficult, at best.  There are many more sub wannabes out there than Femdom wannabes, and I'm not at all sure that I even want such a thing for Karl.   I expressed my happiness at his ability to deal with my wishes, and his total trust in me, etc., etc., and that's where we left it.

Well, there's more to ponder, but for the moment I can feel a sense of relief that Karl has accepted the itch and I have a clear path to training a sub once again.    As for the immediate future, I'm definitely feeling excited about the prospect of training a new sub, and I am giving some thought to the idea of a re-training for Karl at the hands of another Dom, though at this moment I feel less than excited at the prospect.  Am I a selfish person?  Of course, and I've never denied it:)

So much to think about!